We all make mistakes, in both life and in sex. However, it is always possible to correct these mistakes and learn from them, which can in turn improve the quality of our sex lives. 

The first step is to acknowledge that we have made a mistake, which can be hard to do when our ego says that we are always right! We have pinpointed a few areas where many of us could do better, with a few ideas of how we can improve the situation going forward.

Having a narrow idea of what sex is

Sometimes we can fall into the trap of keeping sex to the basic formula; in the bedroom, using the missionary position, on the same day and for the same amount of time. Like most repetitive things, this can quickly become a chore, a task that we must tick off our list at the end of the week. 

Good sex is about being spontanious and expressing our love in different ways. Otherwise a relationship can become stale, boring and sometimes lead to partners straying if they feel they are not being fulfilled. Try to mix up your routine, experiment with new positions and speak to each other about what you would like to explore in your sex life as you move forward.

Skipping foreplay

We all have busy lives that leave us tired at the end of the day. But this is no excuse for skipping foreplay in favour for getting sex over with!

Foreplay is very important for getting us in the mood and for raising the excitement levels as you move towards intercourse. Kissing, stroking and oral sex are great for getting the juices flowing, as well as bringing some exciting sex toys into the mix. Check out our great collection of sex toys for some ideas! 

Having high expectations

Sex isn’t like it is the movies and you should never compare yourself to friends who say their sex lives are fabulous and exciting. Reality can be very different, which can be disappointing if you have built up an idea of explosive orgasams and mind-blowing experiences in your head.

Sex can be exciting and it can be thrilling, but not necessarily all of the time. We all have off days, so don’t fret if the deed is over quickly or if the earth didn’t move for you. It is likely to be better next time and improve each time that you get together.

Ignoring our own needs

Many couples have one sided sexual experiences, where one partner gives it all to the other and receives very little in return. This can lead them to feel unfulfilled and neglected, but often they won’t say anything and simply continue in the same pattern. Big mistake!

Talking to your partner is crucial in this situation, as they may be oblivious to how you’re feeling. Explain that you would like to spend more time attending to your needs rather than just theirs, making some suggestions about what you would like to do.

Keeping sex in the bedroom

It is quite an old fashioned idea to believe that sex should be confined to the bedroom. If this is what you prefer, then great, but you may feel like you are missing out because you don’t feel like you can suggest it to your partner.

Start simply by taking it to the sofa, then perhaps the shower, then the kitchen table! If you’re feeling brave, look at how the garden could work for you, then the sky's the limit! Unless you’re thinking of joining the mile high club, in which case there are no limits!